1. Safe relationships involve
suspending judgment –I can't begin to recount the times
I've jumped to conclusions regarding my judgment of someone's
motives.Even though "what" someone has done is clear, "why" they did it
is rarely as obvious. It takes time and patience to discover what is in
someone's heart and what motive was behind their behavior.
2. Safe relationships involve
celebrating differences - The difference between you and
others is a reason for celebration. The beauty of the distinction
between you, your friends, your mate and your family members can be
likened to the genius of the different parts of the human body having
unique functions, yet contributing to the health of the whole body.
3. Safe relationships involve
honoring others – We demonstrate honor to others by
respecting their perspective and opinions. When we allow others to
express their views and feelings, we are communication the fact that
they have value. In the Bible we read, "Be devoted to one another in
brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves." [Romans 12:10]
4. Safe relationships involve being
trustworthy – Tom Peters, businessman and author says,"
Technique and technology are important, but adding trust is the issue
of the decade." Mahatma Gandhi said, "The moment there is suspicion
about a person's motives, everything he does becomes tainted."
Trust is a function of both character and
competence. Consequently, strive to follow through with your promises –
both in word and performance.
5. Safe relationships involve
respecting boundaries – Often when people feel
threatened or insecure they will erect an emotional wall of protection.
Resist the temptation to knock down the wall and force yourself through
their boundaries. Instead through patience and understanding, create a
climate where the other person feels safe enough to begin to lower the
wall of protection on their own and in their own time.
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Article Source: http://
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About the Author
Michael Fehlauer has been married to Bonnie over
30 years. They have experienced both the height of success and the
devastation of failure. As a result, Michael Fehlauer and Bonnie
Fehlauer have a strong desire to see the same healing they have
experienced happen in the lives of others. Michael Fehlauer and Bonnie
Fehlauer have traveled extensively throughout the world holding
marriage and family conferences.
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